When the party hit full swing, I saw you coming in, You had that six pack in a stranglehold. Now you stagger, now you sway, Why don’t you fall the other way. ‘Cos I’ve got something here worth more than gold. Chorus: Don’t sit on my Jimmy Shands, Don’t sit on my Jimmy Shands. They don’t mend with sticky tape and glue. Don’t sit on my Jimmy Shands, Don’t sit on my Jimmy Shands. That’s my very best advice to you! Call me precious I don’t mind, 78’s are hard to find. You just can’t get the shellac since the war. This one’s the Beltona brand, Finest label in the land. They don’t make them like that any more! Darling, though you’re twice my size, I don’t mean to patronize, Honey let me take you by the hand. Find a lap or find a chair, You can park it anywhere. Just don’t rest your cheeks against my man! No shindig is half complete Without that famous polka beat. That’s why they invite me, I suppose! Waltzes, Strathspeys, eightsome reels, Now you know how good it feels. Crank that handle babe, away she goes.
25/7/03
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